Rewards and Punishments
by kikimaru21355
Summary: Axels life has been messed up since collage, but only one person can help him, who? How can he help? Rating is M just becuse i dont know.
1. What a life

Hey long time since I've done one of these, fanfics I mean. Anyways I started replaying Kingdom Heart II and got all extra happy because supposable they are making Kingdom Hearts II Final Mix RE: Chain of Memories for PS2 and they may release it in the fall this year (in the US). Also with the happy note I'm all hyped up on the Organization XIII, and I've been a fan of yaoi for a while now but I never thought of using it in a Kingdom Hearts fanfic, my pairing in this fanfic is not Axel and Roxas (which I can see but I just don't like that couple), not Sora and Riku, or Sora and Roxas. My pairing is … I'm not telling I want you to kind of be surprised. So I hope you like, I'm not that great at writing stories but I give it a shot anyways. .

Disclaimer thingy ….. Blah, blah, blah…. just read the story.

**Rewards and Punishments**

**By: Kiki**

Chapter 1

Axels thoughts

"If you have a dream, don't wait. Act. One of life's little rules. Got it memorized?" That's what I thought, but I always left out the other two important rules. "Think before you act," and "Life's a bitch." Well if you think about it, there are no rules because those last two rules just make a laughing joke of the first one. I really shouldn't be talking, rules didn't fuck up my life, they can't. Rules are just words written on paper, words spread to people's ears and absorbed into their minds. When those people don't follow those rules they are punished but when followed they are rewarded. So what's right? What's wrong?

Have I done wrong? Harm, yes. But wrong?

Here's something to memorize if you want to. Rules don't affect our lives, the people that teach the rules to us do. So does that mean that the people teaching these rules are wrong, so they get punished, right? No, they get rewarded. The people screwing other people's lives get fucking rewarded. So what does that leave me with? Punishment. I'm punished for what other people taught me.

End of Axel's thoughts

Axel was lying there, on a bench in the park; his clothes were torn and wet from the rain. His position was not the most comfortable one but he didn't care; he looked like he sat down and collapsed. He stared at the ground so intensely that he might as well have been sleeping with his eyes open. Not even the movement of people's feet could get him to look away. He wondered why people were even out this late; it was almost 4 a.m. They should be home sleeping, that's where he would be, if he had a home. It's not that one of his friends couldn't take him in; it was more of that he didn't really have any friends that probably wanted to take in a bum. Roxas would be too disappointed that Axel didn't want to worry him, he didn't talk to Larxene much since she got into a relationship with Saïx, and he hadn't spoken with Marluxia since high school, he probably forgot all about Axel.

After lying there for about another ten minutes or so he moved to sit up again, he propped himself with his right arm. He looked around through his wet bangs, noticing that no one was around. It was like they had read his mind and all decided to go home. Axel sighed, this was his life and it will always be his life. Poor, not too poor though that he couldn't afford food but poor enough that new clothes and a home were way out of the question. He lived out of his backpack; he had one change of clothes, his money, and the two things that messed up his life, a bag of marijuana and a medication bottle of heroin. Those two items, with the other items needed to inject the heroin, were hidden in a small black cosmetic bag, which he hid inside a small hidden compartment in his backpack; he also kept his money in there.

There was one item that he also kept on himself instead of in his backpack; it was the only thing that reminded him that it wasn't his fault for everything that's happened, that his life was not a total waste. It was a photo of Larxene, Marluxia, Roxas, Demyx, Xigbar, Luxord, Xaldin, and himself sitting on a couch laughing. He remembered everything just by looking at this picture, who took it, what day it was, why they were there, everything.

Flashback

They were at Axel's house, in his room; he had the biggest room because his room was the basement. He had the "party" room, he had a corner couch with an old coffee table and he had a huge bed, queen size. His walls had typical posters of his favorite movies, a few posters from concerts that he had gone to, and two identical ring-looking weapons. He had a huge TV about 42" and almost every game council and all the good games, this was where you could always find Luxord and Marluxia battling away, Roxas would sit on the couch watching with Demyx and Xigbar next to him. The good thing about his room was the he had two computers, a laptop and a normal computer, because Larxene was on the computer most of the time and Axel guarded his laptop. Axel also had a bookshelf in his room just full of mangas, which was were Xaldin and Saïx liked to be, Xaldin had his ipod to listen too but Saïx preferred no music.

They all had just finished there last exam, and went to Axel's house to celebrate. Axel's parents were away and trusted Axel with the house for the week. Now when it comes to teens and celebrations you think beer, wild parties, and in the morning people waking up together in bed. Well not this party, it wasn't wild random people just coming in from all over it was just the closest friends. But they still did the same stuff they had the beers, well some of them did. With Marluxia at that party he was the "wild party", so they laughed and Axel went upstairs and grabbed a camera. When he came back down he placed it on the TV stand and told everyone to sit on the couch. When they did Axel set up a timer and started to run back but Saïx got off the couch and stopped it. He refused to have his picture taken, so he volunteered to take the picture.

Now what came next I don't think they were expecting it, they were going to do a "nice" picture because there was only one picture left on the film. Saïx started the count down from 5. When he got to one, Xigbar, on the border line of drunk and just plain stupid, shouted out the word "PENIS". Saïx took the shoot, on accident while everyone was laughing.

It was soon after Axel went to collage that he got hooked on the marijuana, from his room mate. Soon after that the heroin fell into the scene. He was kicked out of collage, and he couldn't go home because of regret, so he decided that he would try and live on his own. He got and apartment and a job working at a movie theatre, but at the amount he was earning, he couldn't stay on top of things; he bought the drugs instead of paying for the rent, so he was kicked out. He stopped going to work, and now his only source of money was through collections by entertaining people with pyronistic tricks.

He tried to stop the drugs, but he couldn't. So that's how he lived for the next 5 years. Homeless, regretful, messed up, and full of hate for "the other people" and himself. He tried to kill himself 2 times both failed. The first time he tried, he was going to do an overdose of the heroin and the marijuana together, but after he started he didn't have enough, he only had enough to get him high and then pass out. The second time he was just going to jump from the highest place he could find. When he found the top of an apartment building he stood on the ledge and looked down, that motion was all that it took to step off from the ledge and into the corner in a huddled ball, scared from the fact that he almost jumped that he started to cry.

Failure was the word that stuck in his head so much since that day, that he though that he shouldn't wait for punishment, it should come now and that this punishment should be a lifetime punishment. His punishment was self infliction, with what ever he could find, broken glass, metal, and then after a house burnt down he took a knife from the ashes. For the last year he has been leaving scares on his body, wrists, just where ever he could remind himself that what has been done is done and he can't do anything about that.

End Flashback

He picked up his backpack and strapped it on his back; he ran his hand through his hair to push his red hair away from his face. Axel sighed again and got off the bench, he was so tired he should just stay right there and sleep but he didn't, he started to walk down the path through the park. He didn't look forward, but looked at his feet when he walked. When he came to the sidewalk he stopped and watched a few cars that went by and then continued to the corner to cross the street. He pushed the little button and waited for the light to say, "walk". When it did he didn't move, he wanted to but his legs were just too tired from walking most of the time. The light started to flash a "don't walk", then it stopped and the light changed green. A care drove around a corner the next block down and started to head towards Axel. "It's was too late to start walking now", he said waiting for the car to go by so he could walk.

Now Axel's luck never seemed to be good, and right now was not the time to be getting the bad luck. Axel became dizzy and tried to fight to stay awake, telling himself 'stay awake, come on, wake up, you can't fall asleep now there's a car coming', but he couldn't. He fell forward just as the car was about to go by. Axel was hit by the car; the cars brakes screeched till it came to a stop, Axel had been lying on the ground a few feet away from the car that hit him. The driver got out and ran over to the knocked out Axel to help him. Axel had blood dripping from his mouth, and had a big cut down the side of his face which was where he was losing most of his blood from, the man couldn't tell but Axel's left shoulder and arm were both broke.

The man pulled out his cell phone and called a hospital, holding his hand over his forehead while talking to the person on the other end. Hanging up, the man took a deep breath and looked at Axel who started to move a bit, he moaned in pain, and put his right hand on his shoulder.

"Don't move, the ambulance is on the way just stay there." The man got up and ran too his car to try and find some rags to cover Axels head so it would help to try and stop the bleeding. The ambulance siren could be herd faintly in the background, the man ripped a piece of an old shirt he had found in his car and placed it over the cut on Axel's head. When the ambulance arrived they picked Axel up and placed him on the stretcher, but when they picked him up his picture fell out of his pocket. The man saw it fall out and picked it up, he looked at it and he saw himself, he knew this picture. When he realized who he hit he asked if he could ride to the hospital with Axel in the ambulance, they let him.

When in the ambulance Axel opened his eyes for 5 seconds, before passing out again he looked to the man and the last thing he saw was his bluish-purple eyes then blank.

Well chapter 1 is done, YAY throws confetti. Well I'm getting to work on chapter 2 right now because I'm killing myself over this cliffy so chapter 2 may be up within a few days or when ever. It's my birthday in a few days so I might not get to writing as quick as I think but if I do then … YAY. Please let me know what you think, I do except flames. (HA HA get it flames, fire, Axel, HA HA …… ok no ones laughing, that was bad.)


	2. Life isn't so bad after all

Well here's chapter 2. It was killing me so I don't care if u like it or not, I want to finish it.

Disclaimer: still don't own anything, but if I did I would be the happiest girl right now.

**Rewards and Punishment**

**By: Kiki**

Chapter 2

Axel stood on the sidewalk he remembered earlier; maybe that whole incident with him getting hit by a car was a daydream. He looked around for a clock; he needed to check the time. Not finding one he saw a person standing at the curb, he walk over to ask the time, but the person didn't talk. 'How rude' he thought, he lifted his hand to tap the persons shoulder, but it fell right through. "What the hell?" He waved his hand through the person; it was like the person wasn't real. Axel went to look at the persons face and jumped when he saw it was himself. "How can that be me? I'm right here" he looked at his hands they were fading away. He started to panic, "What's going on?" a car turned around the corner; he realized what was going on. He must have died after that car hit him, the whole scene played exactly as he saw it before; him fighting to stay awake, then he passed out. His vision of the scene was becoming black, 'No I have to see the man, I know him.' His vision became black. 'No' he sat down on black nothingness, brought his knees to his chest, and placed his head on his knees. 'I saw his eyes but the face is not coming to my head, why? I know him."

'This black place must be where people go when they die.' He thought. He didn't want to be dead; if he wanted to be dead he would have jumped from the ledge of the apartment building. He wanted to go home, restart his life, and apologize for everything. He started to cry.

"Axel."

He lifted his head, looking around for the voice again. He knew that voice, he may not have herd it in a long time but he knew it.

"Axel, wake up Axel."

"Wake up? I'm not sleeping, I can't wake up" he shouted and looking around, still nothing but black. He closed his eyes tightly, and opened them. When he opened them he was in a bed at a hospital, he let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding in. He tried to sit up but as soon as he moved it was like he was hit by another car because he hurt. His head had the worst headache he had ever had in his life, his left side of his body felt like it wasn't there anymore. He put his head back down on the pillow, and moaned in pain. Axel moved his right hand on the bed till it found something softer then the sheets that were on the bed. He picked up his head off the pillow and looked down, there was someone there but he couldn't tell who, it was too dark.

He reached his hand to touch the person's head, which caused the person to wake up. They mumbled and yawned; when he realized that Axel was awake he sat up strait. "Axel I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hit you, I wasn't drunk or anything like that you just fell before I could stop." The man kept apologizing, but sadly Axel still couldn't see his face in the dark, he didn't know who was sorry.

"Not trying to sound mean but I can't see who you are, can you turn on a light or something?" Axel said tiredly. The man got up and found a small light on the nightstand and turned it on. When then light turned on Axel quickly shut his eyes, apparently he has been use to the dark from sleeping his vision was blurry. When Axel's eyes adjusted to the light he saw the man was turned around so Axel saw his back, he had hair just past his shoulders in a pinkish-brown color. As if embarrassed to look at Axel he turned slowly, afraid he was going to get a yelling at, similar to a kid getting yelled at by a parent.

"Marluxia?!?!" He stared at him for a while. "I haven't seen you in …. "He faded off.

"Yeah, it's been a while hasn't it?" Feeling awkward he just stood there quietly.

"Soooo….. Why were you out driving at that late anyways?" Axel asked.

"I had to finish some paper work, and it took a while to do. But I should be the one asking you the same question. Why weren't you home?" Marluxia sat down in the chair next to Axel's bed again a waited for an answer. When he looked at Axel he saw that he was ignoring his face.

"Well…." He began, "I … don't really …. Have a home to go to." He said this with a feeling that hurt to admit he didn't have a home. Almost like a knife was in his chest.

"Sorry I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable saying that, but can I ask what happened to you that you became homeless?" Marluxia looked at Axel; he was silent, the knife now twisting. "You don't have to answer, I wasn't expecting you too."

"No, I should really stop hiding from my past, its killing me somewhat to keep it inside." Axel rested his head back on the pillow; he turned his head to the side and looked at the window realizing his backpack was there. "Hand me my backpack and ill show you, then ill tell you the rest" Marluxia stood and grabbed Axel's backpack for him and places it on Axel's right side. "Unzip this part." He pointed to the bigger section and Marluxia unzipped it. Axel reached in and undid a Velcro pocket to pull out the black cosmetic bag; handing it to Marluxia. "Open it but don't take what's inside out from that bag, I don't want to get into trouble."

Marluxia was curies to what was in the bag and he unzipped the bag cautiously, just incase there was something that would pop out. When unzipped he looked inside, Axel closed his eyes and spoke. "Instead of buying a place to stay I bought those, because I couldn't stop. I've tried to stop but I can't, it use to be a lot worse but I've gotten better." Marluxia was shocked; he never expected in his entire life that Axel would be one of the people on drugs. "Why didn't you talk to anyone?" he asked.

"To tell you the truth, I don't know. You didn't know but my life got pretty bad, to the point I tried to kill myself… twice." Marluxia couldn't find the words to say anything; he just looked at Axel and let him continue with his story. "I couldn't kill myself, I don't know why; I guess you could say I didn't have it in me. So instead of killing myself, I did the next thing I could think of, cutting myself as punishment." Axel had tears falling down his face now, this confession was the hardest thing he had ever done. He picked his right arm off the bed and moved it towards the light. Marluxia could now see all the scares that Axel had on his arm; they seemed to go in almost every direction from his wrist to his shoulder. "There is more but you can't see them, they are on my other arm, and on my sides near my hips." He pulled back his arm that was in the light and placed it back on the bed next to his side. "I don't like this life, I want to go home, I want to be happy without having to force it out" he said letting it all just come out.

Marluxia thought for a second to rethink all of what Axel just said. "Why don't you just go back home." Axel shook his head, "I can't, I'm too ashamed." Marluxia than can up with an idea, not knowing if it will work or not he gave it a shot anyways. "Well if you want, I have an extra bed room at my place; you welcome to stay there if you want."

"You really mean it, I wont be a bother to you will I?" Axel was surprised, he never thought that some one would want to help him, but then again he never tried. Marluxia looked at him and nodded his head, "you never once bothered me, were best friends right?"

Axel forgot that they promised to be best friends forever, sounds corny but it's true. They use to be the troublemakers of their school, if one got in trouble the other was guilty also. If you described their personality you would think that they were brothers, besides the fact that Marluxia had pinkish-brown hair and liked flowers and Axel's hair was black but he dyed it a bright red and he was a pyro.

"Thanks, that makes me feel a lot better." After he said this, his left arm started to hurt, and he winced. 'The pain killers must be wearing off' he said to himself. Marluxia noticed and he started to feel bad again, "I'm really sorry about that, I just feel so horrible about this whole event." Marluxia slightly tilted his head down sadly.

"Don't feel so bad, this is going to sound kind of mean, but if you didn't hit me then we never probably would have seen each other for a long time. And who knows, maybe hitting me was what caused me to confess and really want to change my life." Axel smiled, hoping to get Marluxia to feel better. Marluxia saw the smile and felt a little better because Axel was half right.

Marluxia looked at his watch, he then stood and stretched. "Well, I have to go; I haven't been to work in two days. I'll come see you tomorrow." When Marluxia said this, Axel had to think for a few minutes. He grabbed Marluxia's wrist just before it was out of reach. "Waite, how long was I out for."

"You were out for two days, but it's almost midnight. You should get some rest I'll be back at 3 p.m. tomorrow. " Marluxia said while gathering his coat. Axel nodded his head and relaxed it agents his pillow, he put his right arm across his face and sighed. Marluxia was heading out when Axel asked, "On your way out, if you see a nurse could you ask them to come in here. I need some more pain killers or ill never get to sleep." Marluxia stopped at the door and looked at him. "Yeah sure." Then he left.

There, happy….. Because I sure am. Well now spring breaks over so chapter 3 might not be done soon. If it is, then holy crap. Well tell me if you like, ill get a start on chapter 3.


End file.
